So who exactly is on the spectrum?

We're nearly there... This term seems to be going on forever! At the same time though I have a scary amount to fit in to the following two and a half weeks so in many ways would like the days to have extra hours in them! Since I last blogged I have had much food for thought. S's diagnosis has been defined and finally, after many years, I feel that we can now really begin to understand and help S rather than survive with him and stay afloat! Saying all that increasingly, with regards to home schooling, I have been having to reign myself in from my own "spectrum" tendancies and be more aware of my son! Let me explain that! We have got ourselves into a great routine. I'm sure I've explained this before so bear with me as I spell it out once more. We begin each day with 15-30 mental arithmetic questions. We then do a page of S's maths workbook which is preceded by a little bit of teaching or revision. This is sometimes then followed by a game on Education City. After maths we have a wee break. Once fed and watered we return to spelling which is either 1 or 2 tasks on the week's words from his Andrew Brodie book. We then read a chapter of his reading book (Monday - S reads to me and then Tues-Friday we do paired reading) followed by a short activity or discussion on the chapter. This is followed by a language activity of some description whether that be a reading comprehension card, a page of grammar work, story writing or an education city game. Depending on how long maths and English take we then do Science work (either practical or book work related depending on our topic), or we do some Geography (we've been working on the continents this term) or some other activity. We then stop for lunch. That can be any time from 12:20-1:00pm depending on how long the work has taken. So it's quite structured! I'm so aware that we are in many ways more formal than many home school families are and I know that some would think I am kind of missing the point of home schooling by keeping it so formal. It has been implied that I'll in effect "grow out" of this way of schooling S and that I'll eventually become more relaxed. But you know it works for us! For S he knows now exactly where he stands and actually can go to the desk and almost work through the programme for the day himself. For me it has reduced the preparation massively and I am confident that S is learning the same as his peers in the main subject areas and that he will hopefully manage to keep up. Flexibility... well, that's a whole other area! Where I am noticing how "spectrumy" I am becoming! As S has become more and more tired at the end of term I am having to reduce our timetable quite a lot. S is coping with this fine! I however am finding it quite frustrating as I know we will not be completing work that I'd hoped we would. I really need to relax!! Today for example, I was wrapping presents for our girls' birthday and S asked if he could help. He did and he really enjoyed it! He then asked if he could learn to tie his shoe laces. I shocked myself and thought, "why not!" and so we mastered knot tying as the first step. It was a real learning point for me. Wrapping presents and tying shoe laces is not something that comes easily to someone on the spectrum and for S this was real life learning in a calm and stress free situation! Surely that is better than struggling through the basics of division when he's tired! I have been mulling over many other issues over the past few days. As I come to terms S's more specific diagnosis I am learning AGAIN just how much I need to challenge my own views of parenting with respect to S. I love him just as much as my other 3 children and want to offer him the same opportunities in life as the others. I am realising more and more though that things are not straight forward for him and that I really need to stop expecting him to just slot in to what other children can do. Being a parent for the past 10 + years has shown me just how judgemental I was and can be about other parents and indeed children and I'm mortified to admit that. Having a child with special needs has really highlighted that in me and made me really face up to what really is important in people and humanity as a whole. Being a Christian has really been a saving grace to me literally! To know that S and indeed all my children have been "fearfully and wonderfully made" is such a blessing to know and to know that God has a plan for each of these children and he has them in the palm of his hand. I must continue to strive to do my best for each of these children as I really do believe that this is the job God has given me to do just now. Very philosophical this week! I hope to blog again before the end of term but we are moving back to our own house (now it is all fixed :0) ) and so the next 3 weeks are likely to be somewhat mental! I'd love any feedback. Maybe you think I'm talking rubbish! For now though I will sign off!